Although you're hesitant, the grip is firm. You're going to use a pencil, because you never know...
You try to reproduce that very same picture you've gazed at so many times. The line is fine, but you're not that talented at drawing. So the first attempt is going to be a draft. However, you're not willing to lose momentum: you're going to play the hard game now.
So you try a couple times, and add some details, and erase it over and over, and then you make new lines. You've got a decent drawing now, but you're not satisfied at all, so you erase it one last time and decide to start the whole thing over. However, because you put too much energy on it, where there was a scrappy drawing now there's a tear, instead. You simply refuse to keep it like that. That's why, after spending a long time for a torn, holy piece of paper in return, you just crumple it up, in rage. Sadly though, there’s no paper left: that’s the only piece of paper you own. So you take it back, trying to remove the wrinkles. But the more you try, the more you become aware that they’ll never disappear. You give in. You warm up to the idea of keeping a unique drawing on a unique piece of paper.
In the end, you will put some scotch tape over the hole, to fix it, and decide that those wrinkles will be fine. After all, they've been part of your creative process.